That one time I almost killed Malfoy
by anccid410
Summary: What if Scorpius blurted out something he shouldn't have about a certain Weasley, and now Albus and Lily Potter are on a mission to prove that Hogwart's most infamous enemies are actually perfect for each other.


''Albus, how many times will I be forced to repeat it to you, I DO NOT, in any circumstances, fancy your troll of a cousin.'' I told him. Generally, I'm not an angry person; actually, I'm not an emotional person whatsoever. Not that I don't feel things, it's just…displaying them publically is so…gryffindor. And I don't do Gryffindor. So you can understand just how mad I really was if I actually raised my voice just now. Yeah, pretty pissed.

You see, Albus was, for the fifteenth time this week, trying to convince me that I, instead of hating his dear cousin Rose, secretly or maybe subconsciously want to snog her senseless and be the father of her little spawns. If anybody else had said it, they would be dead long time ago, but I tolerate Albus for unknown reasons.

Al and I are best friends, thick as thieves, since day one. He helped me out when some idiots bullied me on the first train ride, I helped him out when he got sorted into slytherin and no one wanted to talk to him. Ever since then, we're like brothers. I really love the guy, and all that, but there's just one thing that bothers me about him. His cousin. Rose Weasley, the stupid hag. Honestly, she's nuts in the head.

Before Albus met me, they had been best of friends, so when I came in, she threw this little tantrum about them being family and shit, and how I was the bad guy, trying to use him to make myself more popular. That one struck the nerve, as If I wanted more attention! I just wanted to crawl in a hole and die unnoticed, because all the stupid names people called me just for being a Malfoy. And she had the audacity to think I wanted more attention. We had a horrid argument and never got along for a minute since then. Albus still hangs out with her though, so we try to tolerate each other when he's around. Also, I spend a lot of time with Al's family during summer, mostly because they all (except Rose and her dad) like me and my folks travel a lot on business. So you get my predicament, we hate each other, and have to spend almost all our time together. It's not always pleasant.

Still, some people (mainly Albus and Lily, because they're all romantic and gay like that) think that we are actually in love. It's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! I mean, I know how couples have their cute little banter and fights, with all the pent up sexual tension and whatnot, but Weasley and me are not at all like that. We fight because we hate each other! Simple as that. She enters the room, looks around, sees me and goes into full bitch mode. And if there's no obvious reason to call me an idiot, trust me, she'll find it. And I won't just lie down and take it, so we start hurling insults back and forth, and then hexes or fists.

Besides, we grew up with each other that way. The reason behind our hatred seems so childish and petty now, but I just can't find it in me to settle things with her, and I don't want to anyway, she's too annoying.

Albus just looked at me knowingly, '' I wouldn't say that, dear friend. I saw the cheeky way you checked her out just before calling her a dumbass before potions.''

''I did no such thing!'' I said, before he even finished the sentence. ''And even if I did, the fact that she's smoking hot doesn't make up for her grindylow personality…'' I stopped myself, but too late.

Albus stopped in his tracks, and stared at me like I sprouted another head. I stared back at him, wide eyed, in anticipation.

''Mate…did you just call Rose smoking hot?'' he asked me, his face stretching in a sickeningly slytherin grin. Damn him!

''N-no…I didn't'' I feebly answered, but he wasn't listening anymore.

''I fucking knew it!'' his grin literary stretched from ear to ear, making his bright green eyes into gleeful little slits. I tried to protest, but he completely ignored me. ''I just knew it! Hahaha, oh Merlin, her dad is going to go bonkers when you tell him you're together…''

What? Great, is he a seer now? ''Albus, what the hell, I didn't even say I liked her!'' he stopped imaging our children for a second to look at me '' Trust me, it's just a matter of time now that you've admitted'' he told me matter-of-factly. He just looked so absurdly convinced; I had no energy to argue with him.

I considered for a second to check him in the hospital wing just in case, but decided against it when he started telling me he would be honored to be my best man. Let him simmer in his own insanity for a bit longer. Instead, I left him in the slytherin common room, and went in the library to study some ancient runes and get my mind off my stupid best friend and his predictions, and a certain redheaded troll's perfect backside.

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I raised my eyes from the spells textbook I was reading when a very excited Lily Potter entered the gryffindor common room and launched herself at me. ''Rosie! What are you doing, studying on a Friday night?'' she frowned and pulled the textbook out of my reach. ''Lily, give me back my book, I have some NEWT's to prepare for. '' You can't skip homework just because it's Friday, not when you're Rose Weasley.

''But Rose, I have some fantastic news! Albus is throwing a party in the snake's pit tonight!''

The snake's pit is a secret room, only recently discovered (by Albus and his dumb best friend, Malfoy), near the dungeons, and seemingly, you can only enter it if you were a slytherin. It has no traces of dark magic in it, and just seems to be a room made for rule-breaking snakes, really. Luckily, if you're from another house, you can enter with a slytherin, and professors aren't aware of the room's existence yet, so some of the wildest, most notorious parties are thrown there.

I have to admit, parties in the snake's pit are always amazing, and even if I weren't half the social butterfly Lily was, I knew I couldn't miss it for the world.

I closed my eyes in defeat and smiled. ''Should we start getting ready then?'' I asked and she squeaked in delight. ''Oh yes! Rose I can't wait! ''

During the entire evening, I noticed Lily being excited way too much. Seemingly, it had something to do with something Malfoy told Albus three weeks ago and the Albus told Lily but she wouldn't tell me. And she kept trying to get me in my tightest, most revealing outfit, blabbing about me having to be hot. I brushed it off, Lily lives for parties and such; she must be on adrenalin high or something. But I was just a little intrigued, what could Malfoy say, regarding me, which got Al and Lily in such a rush?

We got all dressed up; I had a short black dress and let my long, curly hair down so it reached my lower back. And black heels to match. Lily had a blue loose t-shirt and a micro mini skirt under it, with knee-high leather boots. I thought it was a bit too much for a fifteen year old but there's no arguing with Lily Potter about fashion.

We got in the deserted corridor near the dungeons and almost froze to death. It was only October, and we had some warming spells on, as well as our school robes, so we're not suspicious, but they weren't enough.

Albus and Malfoy were waiting for us, Malfoy looking even more annoyed to see me than usual. I nodded at Al and ignored Malfoy's presence completely. He didn't even bother to react, just looked extremely pissed at Albus, who was faking to be oblivious. What's up with the Potters today?

I reached to grab Al's hand and enter the room but Lily literally jumped and snatched it away. ''Sorry cuz, I have some urgent matters to discuss with my brother, Scor can get you in, see you inside!'' she chirped and pushed Albus, who was grinning apologetically, through the enchanted barrier.

They were gone before I could react and I turned to realize, I had to get in with Malfoy! Those to little morons left me here with the devil's dog to negotiate! He would never hold my hand for long enough to make it through the pathway and I wouldn't hold his hand either.

I turned to stare at him, refusing to believe my supposed 'friends' Al and Lily. He seemed a bit more relaxed now that Albus was gone, but still annoyed as hell, for reason unbeknownst to me. We've spent a full minute in a stare-down, and it was getting ridiculous.

''Well, aren't you going to walk me inside?'' I asked, commandingly. He sneered and said nothing, just kept staring at me scornfully. I almost screamed in frustration, just who does he think he is?!

''Ugh! Fine, Malfoy, whatever!'' I stubbornly turned my back to him and stared at the brick wall that hid the entrance to the snake's pit.

''You know Weasley, I could be a gentleman and escort you through that door, but that would involve actually touching you, and I'm afraid I'm not comfortable with that.'' He spoke, almost cheerfully, as if he was talking about the weather. I turned, already reaching for my wand, to teach him a desperately needed lesson in manners. He was standing against the wall, glaring at me, and challenging me with his eyes.

''What is your problem with me today, anyway, I barely talked to you for weeks!'' I was getting desperate. Lily insisted that we were 'fashionably late' but now the party was definitely in full swing, and I was missing it because of mister Arsehole over here! I raised my wand, and set myself on at least serious injury, but he ducked out of the way in light speed and the wall that has been behind him only seconds ago shattered in million pieces.

He was covered in dust, seething mad, and as I was trying to see through the dirt and rubblewhen he sneaked behind me and, in some sort of a body-lock, snatched my wand away from me and had my back painfully pressed against his front.

''I…_cough..._I thought you…_cough…_didn't want to touch me?'' I struggled against him, but he wouldn't budge. He held me tighter, snarling in my ear, his voice dripping with hatred and malice, '' I decided to change plans, it would be only fitting if I strangled you with my bare hands.'' Despite myself, I shuddered at his words. I knew in the back of my mind that he wouldn't hurt me, but still, I was alone in a dark corridor, at the mercy of the man I tried to blast into pieces just ten seconds ago. Although I couldn't see his face, I could sense him arguing with himself whether or not he should actually hurt me. I wouldn't blame him if he did; he escaped a violent death in a split second.

He was frightened too, high on adrenalin. His chest was heaving, his arms shaking just a bit, and he was holding on to me a tad desperately. Finally, he let me go, and I turned to face him. He bore into my eyes intensely, and I was taken aback. The dust had lain off, and the air was clear again, I could see his grayish eyes clear up and shine, as the feeble lights from the corridor reflected in the orbs. His expression was unreadable, but I could sense a strong emotion radiating off him.

''I cannot believe you have just done that!'' his voice was surprisingly clear, and rapidly rising by the second. In all our years of being archenemies, he had raised his voice or showed any emotion just a handful of times, all those resulting with me in the hospital wing. ''WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING WEASLEY?!'' he was yelling real loud now, and I actually felt bad. He didn't do anything so bad it deserved that blasting spell. I was just…frustrated, but I figured I should have known better.

I had the right mind to quickly cast a silencing spell around us, so we don't wake half the castle and land everyone in trouble. He kept running his hands through his hair, making it crazy messy and…kind of cute.

I stood there like a guilty child, but, for the first time in my life when it comes to Malfoy, I decided to do the adult thing and listen to his rant and apologize. His yelling never came again through.

I looked up, only to see him smiling at me. Apparently, the initial shock wore off, and he was just amused by me. My face went into a scowl in a millisecond, what the hell is his problem? ''Are you amused now?'' I asked, ultimately annoyed. It was getting really hard to feel sorry for him now.

''You really are a strange one, aren't you?'' he simply stated. It wasn't taunting, or accusatory, it looked like he was studying me. I was taken aback by his laid back, even friendly tone.

''I guess…I do…is that a problem?'' I asked arguably, unsure whether he was playing with me.

He chuckled, ''Fine, I'll lead you in'' he snaked his hand around my shoulders like it was the most natural thing in the world and led us towards the brick wall ''but you owe me a dance.''

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You owe me a dance?! What the hell was I thinking?! She'll think I'm some kind of a creep now, another desperate guy. And from where did that cozy little hug come from? I don't put my arms around archenemies, what the hell?

She really freaked me out just now, blasting that bloody wall above my head. She usually threatens for way longer than that before she actually tries to hex me. I ducked just in time, and my first instinct was to somehow take her wand. I grabbed her and took her weapon, but only a moment after I realized our position.

We were alone in the dark corridor, her tight little body firmly pressed against mine. And that dress is way too short for anyone but me to see her in it. Did I just think that? Merlin…

The thing is, over the last couple weeks, after I had accidentally told Albus that I might think Rose is hot, I started believing it. It's a fact, she's freaking hot! I'M NOT IN LOVE WITH HER, and I still hate her guts, but heck, I'm a seventeen year old guy and she's a babe so yeah, wouldn't mind having my way with her, that's all. Not that I will ever act on that hormonal impulse.

The only reason I let her out of my grasp just now is because I was getting hard, and that would be embarrassing as fuck to explain. When she turned, for some reason, I couldn't stop myself from smiling. She was so confused and spooked out, I thought it was adorable. I may have even slipped a few weird comments about her fascinating me. Now, I have a strange feeling inside, because I'm not sure if I made a complete fool out of myself or not.

We entered the party and I still hadn't let go of her, she seemed to be uncomfortable for only a second, and then she somehow naturally relaxed into me. I must say, I enjoyed it a smidge more than I would have if any other girl did the same thing.

The snake's pit is a pretty vast space, with no windows or doors part from the entrance. It has practically no decorations except for a massive carving of a serpent on each wall. There was a big table filled with different types of alcohol on the left, and everything else was a dance floor. If you were too tired you had to either sit on the floor or transfigure some dirt into a chair of something. I could see Albus in the middle of the crowd, throwing his limbs about, as if he was having some kind of seizure. Seemingly, everyone were already pissed drunk, which meant me hugging Weasley would go unnoticed, I thought happily.

I lowered my arm from her shoulders to her waist and pulled her towards the drinks, and she wrapped the arm that was closer to me around my waist. I raised my eyebrows, and smiled to myself.

The music was unbearable, some kind of rave, trance music everyone were into these days. Call me old fashioned, but I'm more of a rock and roll kind of guy. I took a full bottle of firewhiskey and offered it to her, she nodded and we left the 'bar' with it. I wondered why she hasn't still shrugged my arm off, but wasn't complaining.

I wasn't sure if she wanted to dance so I indecisively placed us at the edge of the dance floor, but she motioned towards an empty corner in the far end. She led us there and pulled out her wand, creating a cozy little sofa. She also out up an incomplete silencing charm, so the music was much more bearable. I let go of her and we sat down, sinking into an awkward silence. Without a better idea, I opened the bottle and took a large gulp to relax, before I even lowered it off my lips, she already took it.

After about a quarter of liquid gone, she finally spoke, ''I'm sorry, you know'' she said '' for almost killing you. I guess I overreacted.'' Her face was determined and her gaze was on the floor. She seemed to be saying it despite herself, like a child forced to apologize. It was hilarious, so I started openly laughing.

She glared at me, ''what is your problem?'' she asked, although halfheartedly, because her lips were twitching upwards. Finally, she started laughing as well. I leaned back and she followed, our breathing still uneven because of laughter. After a few nerve-racking seconds, I decided to push my luck and wrapped my arm around her again. This time, she immediately snuggled close against me.

We continued silently drinking, until the bottle was half finished. My mind was incoherent, my body limp, and I didn't understand exactly what was happening around me. Rose was sleepy, but her silencing spell wore off, and the heavy beat of the music was keeping us from passing out.

By this point, Rose was comfortably sitting in my lap, my arms wrapped tight around her, her head resting in the crook of my neck, if you asked me how we got into this position, I wouldn't have a clue. She kept telling me something, and I kept responding. But I doubt either of us knew what we were talking about. Finally, she whispered something in my ear and I smiled and looked at her. She lifted her chin and pressed her lips against mine.

Even in our utter intoxication, we weren't drunkenly groping and eating each other's faces. It was a sweet kiss and it might have progressed into something more if there wasn't a sudden flash of light and a sound of a camera taking a photo.

We broke off and she clumsily tried to get off my lap and run away on the other side of the couch. Lily Potter. Apparently, even though her older brother let her in his party and everything, he didn't allow her drinking, so she was sober and watching us throughout the entire evening. I knew Albus shouldn't have told her of my stupid blurt out about Rose. Now she had photos of us! Merlin, I sobered up in seconds. Lily hopped off, out of our reach, and Weasley and I were left in the most awkward of all silences.


End file.
